Prompt - Something Lost, Something Found

[infringe]

SONG OF THE SEA ( joshua, alecto ) A selkie far from home, searching for his coat. He meets a kind, lonely, young fisherman who tends the lighthouse near the sea.

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[singinthestorm]

Avery looks between his two parents, aware of the conversation, but clearly confused at how tense things are, on such a bright clear morning, which would typically be filled with laughter and delight as the three of them got ready for the day together.

"I'd...hoped," his words come out haltingly, shaky, but genuine, "that - maybe I could be enough." He glances at Avery, and then again at Alecto, at the new shared life already growing within him. "But I do know now that I can't - that I could never - be enough."

"I wasn't - I'm still not - ready for what I think this means. Because of what I know I've done. But that's my responsibility to bear, not yours."

[infringe]

He listens, his expression unchanging, though something in his heart softens. He finds himself, once again, with the sea to his back and the man he loves before him, and unable to move, to choose.

"Joshua," he says, quietly, a little helplessly. His heart still pulls towards him, pained to see him in pain, even if Alecto himself was still struggling to forgive him for bearing this secret. "I..." do love you he wants to say. That hasn't changed, won't change. But how can he explain that he's more than just this, that he's a wild creature, bound to the song of the sea, and that sometimes loss can be so big, bigger than imagining, too big for even love to cover over -

" - need to go." The words are barely audible, the hum and call of the ocean now so clear, so reachable.

Alecto's hand goes to his stomach almost automatically, and then glances over to Avery who looks so confused, so defeated. There's an immeasurable sorrow that fills Alecto now, making him want to rush to comfort his son, hold him close. He's innocent in this, completely. Alecto feels terrible to have to put his pup through this pain.

"Come here, my little one," he beckons, bending down, and Avery instantly rushes to him, sensing something is changing, leaving. Alecto kisses his forehead as he starts to cry, a bright tear tracing a path down his cheek and dripping onto his son's dark hair. "Listen to me. Be good now. I need to...I need to go for a while, do you understand?" Avery doesn't, it's clear in his little face, and he may never, but Alecto rushes on.

"Remember when you asked me to swim in the sea last night? I can do that now, and I - I can go home." He cups the side of his son's face, tilts it to look up at him. "I haven't been home in so very long. So I - I need to do that now. Alright? Help take care of your father for me, will you? Oh, my little tidal wave. I love you so." Alecto's voice cracks just a little, clutching his son close, his sealskin between them, a thin divider, before he pulls back and quickly lets the robe he was previously wearing fall to the ground, replacing it with his coat, the fur sliding onto him with such practice familiarity. Safe, he feels safe and whole. Finally.

He makes for the door, a blur of silver and magic, and chances a look back at his husband, at the house they made together, the family they were building. His chest goes tight. It's not fair, he thinks. It's not fair that he has to break Joshua's heart to mend his own.

[singinthestorm]

He watches Alecto closely, quiet throughout the tender exchange between him and Avery, every word a needle of pain - Alecto's resolve, his quiet determination, his care and consideration for their son. He doesn't deserve the little thoughtfulness, he thinks, a wry curl of dark humor in the midst of the despair he is desperately trying to hold at bay. There is nothing he can say, he has no right to try to sway Alecto. He had known this was a possibility the moment he grasped the contents of that letter and chose silence over truth, out of fear; but it would do Avery no good for him to add to the complicated confusion of the moment, to be caught between his two parents and their two different worlds.

Joshua stands up from where he's been sitting and walks forward, takes Avery's hand gently in his own as he walks past him where he is staring, teary-eyed and bemused, and leads him to the door where Alecto is standing, looking back. Joshua's eyes are dry, his expression as calm and steady as he can make it, but if anyone in this world knows him well, it is Alecto Archer, his wife of six years, the keeper of their home and his heart, the mother of their son, of another child he might never get a chance to meet. He reaches out with his other hand, his fingers tentative and gentle as they wrap around Alecto's wrist, as he bows his head low and brings it up to his mouth for a kiss, the slightest brush of his lips against the back of Alecto's hand.

"Please take care of yourself," he murmurs. He doesn't know if he can say everything else in his heart - how much he loved Alecto, how much he would be missed, how often he would look out at the sea and wish him well, how sorry he was for his human weakness and sentiment.

And then he lets go.

[infringe]

Words are lost on him. He swallows around a lump in his throat. The press of Joshua's lips to the back of his pale hand makes Alecto want to cry, a sob heaving itself out from deep in his chest. He turns fully, temporarily, away from the door, to grab hold of his husband's handsome, tired, despairing face and kiss him, fully, mouth open, apologies and regret and love pouring forward all in equal measure.

He wants to stay. But he can't help but leave.

"Darling," he says, that treasured term of endearment, now a farewell, trembling with so much feeling. He pulls back to press their foreheads together, briefly. But, try as he might, nothing else comes to him then, a multitude of things he wishes he could say, wishes he could explain, compromise on. But the tide is calling and his magic must run free -

So with that, he flees, his tears stinging cold on his face, but the breath of relief he feels when he finally pulls up the hood of his coat and turns back to what he's supposed to be...it's unparalleled.

Alecto disappears beneath the swell of the rising tide, a flash of pearl white. On the black rocks of the sea cliffs from where he leapt, he leaves behind his wedding band, a thin gold halo glinting in the sun.